A few years ago, when I was expecting my now three-year-old son, I got to thinking about my life since I'd been married and realizing that in the six years I'd been married, I had done a decent job in raising two kids from babies to preteens, but that I had missed most of it! I didn't often enough sit and enjoy the little things in their lives. I'd done the ballet recitals and soccer games, tying shoes and braiding hair, but I hadn't enjoyed it like I should have. Those precious moments were gone and there was no way to get them back. I had done what so many mothers do, I got caught up in "I can't wait until..." I can't wait until she can walk, or talk or tie her own shoes, until he's big enough to get his own drink of water, go to the pool by himself, or go to school. But while I was wishing for all those milestones, I was missing the moments around me. So I made a decision then and there that I was going to stop wishing for the future. I was going to start enjoying NOW.
It's true that I have missed several moments, some are captured in scrapbooks or journals and some are forgotten, but in the last three years, I have built up a treasure of NOW moments. It was a difficult transition and I had to catch myself often, but it is pretty much routine now. When one of my big kids says to me "Won't it be nice when Zac can talk? or sit by himself? or feed himself?" I say "nope, I'm enjoying this stage", because all too soon it will be gone. I'm sad that I missed so many moments with my bigger kids, but sitting around missing those times will only make me miss out on more moments. Moments of watching Natasha snuggle Zac and just appear to be in Heaven, or Peter playing cars with David and both of them laughing until it hurts, Heather trying new hairstyles and learning to tease her Dad as much as he teases her. These are the moments that I want to remember. I don't want to remember nagging my kids to clean their rooms, or brush their hair or sit up straight (Although I do all those things...) I want to remember Peter struggling to write and essay and being so proud when he got it right, Heather sitting down to paint an amazing picture-something she didn't think she could do, Natasha happily teaching David his colours, David reading "That's not My Baby" to Zachary and pointing out the mirror at the end of the story, Zac smiling so big at me because he recognized my face when I leaned over his crib to pick him up. These are the NOW these are the things that matter. So as I sit and type with my toddler curled up on my lap, I'm going to take an extra moment to hold him and smell his hair and kiss his cheeks, because all too soon he'll be too big to fit on my lap and I'll have other NOW moments to enjoy.
These are some of my favourite pictures of moments. I often find I don't take enough pictures of the moments. But I'm not too worried about it because that means I'm enjoying the moment. I don't want to miss it being behind the camera!
A few years ago, when I was expecting my now three-year-old son, I got to thinking about my life since I'd been married and realizing that in the six years I'd been married, I had done a decent job in raising two kids from babies to preteens, but that I had missed most of it! I didn't often enough sit and enjoy the little things in their lives. I'd done the ballet recitals and soccer games, tying shoes and braiding hair, but I hadn't enjoyed it like I should have. Those precious moments were gone and there was no way to get them back. I had done what so many mothers do, I got caught up in "I can't wait until..." I can't wait until she can walk, or talk or tie her own shoes, until he's big enough to get his own drink of water, go to the pool by himself, or go to school. But while I was wishing for all those milestones, I was missing the moments around me. So I made a decision then and there that I was going to stop wishing for the future. I was going to start enjoying NOW.
It's true that I have missed several moments, some are captured in scrapbooks or journals and some are forgotten, but in the last three years, I have built up a treasure of NOW moments. It was a difficult transition and I had to catch myself often, but it is pretty much routine now. When one of my big kids says to me "Won't it be nice when Zac can talk? or sit by himself? or feed himself?" I say "nope, I'm enjoying this stage", because all too soon it will be gone. I'm sad that I missed so many moments with my bigger kids, but sitting around missing those times will only make me miss out on more moments. Moments of watching Natasha snuggle Zac and just appear to be in Heaven, or Peter playing cars with David and both of them laughing until it hurts, Heather trying new hairstyles and learning to tease her Dad as much as he teases her. These are the moments that I want to remember. I don't want to remember nagging my kids to clean their rooms, or brush their hair or sit up straight (Although I do all those things...) I want to remember Peter struggling to write and essay and being so proud when he got it right, Heather sitting down to paint an amazing picture-something she didn't think she could do, Natasha happily teaching David his colours, David reading "That's not My Baby" to Zachary and pointing out the mirror at the end of the story, Zac smiling so big at me because he recognized my face when I leaned over his crib to pick him up. These are the NOW these are the things that matter. So as I sit and type with my toddler curled up on my lap, I'm going to take an extra moment to hold him and smell his hair and kiss his cheeks, because all too soon he'll be too big to fit on my lap and I'll have other NOW moments to enjoy.
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